Tag Archives: Beauty

Things That are Hard to Say

R.Simple Life | Wanting a Baby

photo courtesy of twenty-fifth and grant.

Some of you know that we didn’t get pregnant with Harry the second we were ready. It took a few months for us to get there. It was a frustrating time, and it started to get hard. But we were lucky. We got this sweet little boy, and I say it all the time, but it’s true… I’m so glad I didn’t get pregnant the first month we were trying. Or the second. Or the third, fourth, etc. Because then I wouldn’t have my Harry. Sure, I would have a different baby that I would have loved just as much (I’m sure) but I wouldn’t have Harry.

There were a few times in the months of negative pregnancy tests that I worried about what would happen if I didn’t get pregnant. If it took longer than we expected. Would I tell anyone? There were only a very, very small number of people who knew we were trying (our own parents didn’t even know). At what point would I have to tell? It was very hard for me when people asked us why we didn’t have kids yet. It was hard for me to be happy with no trace of jealousy for my friends, family, and acquaintances who were expecting.

I couldn’t imagine telling anyone. It was such a personal, vulnerable thing. But there comes a point when you just have to get it out. To stop the innocent questions. To help people understand why your smile is funny when they tell you their pregnant. My sweet, sweet friend is at that point now.

She is so strong. So inspiring. And she said all the words that no one wants to have to say. I’m not sharing it because I think she needs your sympathy (she doesn’t) or your words of wisdom (maybe keep them to yourself). I’m sharing it because it is so beautifully written, so amazingly heartfelt. And it might just help one of you. I love this lady, and I know she will make an unbelievable Mama to some lucky kids one day.

Stories like Amy’s are helpful on so many levels. I’m positive it was a huge weight off her shoulders to get this out. I’m sure she will touch other hopeful mothers-to-be in the same situation. And I hope her story will serve as a reminder to those of us who are lucky enough to kiss our kids to bed tonight. Remember to be patient. Remember to love unconditionally. Remember what you have is special. Remember the responsibility, the joy, the pride you can and do have.

xoxo, Mallory

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Thoughts About Beauty

How do you see yourself? Do you see beauty? Laughter and light? Do you see the way your eyes sparkle when you laugh? Or do you see a crooked nose? A weak chin? Crows feet around those eyes? Dove recently conducted a compelling social experiment which I found super interesting.

I’ll let you watch the video, but the gist of it is this: women were asked to describe themselves to a FBI trained portrait artist. You know the guy. He draws suspects from people’s descriptions of them. They were then asked to describe another woman they had met earlier in the day. The comparisons were shockingly different.

We are so harsh on ourselves. Our body image, our idea of beauty, it’s never quite right (just ask Jonathan how many times I’ve broken down in angry tears over something only I could see about my appearance). Why? Why are we our worst critics?

Day in and day out I see myself in the mirror. I see the pimple hiding under my chin or the circles forming under my eyes. I see a little extra bloat one day and sunken cheeks another day. I see my hair on it’s best days and on it’s worst days. And I am critical. But why?

Is it because I see myself every day so I see the little differences? Is it my perfectionism that points out all the crazy new growth at the crown of my head? Is it the way I was raised? The role models in my life never being content with their outside?

Whatever it is, it’s crazy. We need to stop being our worst enemies. We need to start seeing the sparkle in our laughing eyes, not the crows feet in the corners. We need to believe it when people tell us how beautiful we are. And sincerely thank them. We need to stop this self doubt, self distaste now. We need to stop comparing. Why? We need to stop robbing ourselves of our happiness and love. For us. For our self esteem. We need to love us.

And if you can’t do that for you, think about the next generation. Think about your daughters and sons when you complain about that extra fat on the inside of your leg that is stubbornly sticking around. Think about the example we are setting. There is nothing better than the pride, the happiness, the excitement consuming Harry’s entire body when he sees himself in the mirror. His face breaks into a grin. His whole body shakes. I never want him to stop seeing himself like that. I never want my son to think he is inadequate. To think he is not the beautiful human he is. I think that would just break my heart.

Let’s start right now. Tell me something beautiful about you. About your outside. I’ll go first. I have a big, bright smile that reaches to my eyes every time. And I love that smile because it can make Harry break out into his own stunning grin. And it can make my husband fall in love just a little more every time.

Your turn.

xoxo, Mallory

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Happy Weekend!

Here’s to weekends full of beauty. Seek it out, find it, and swim in it.

xoxo, Mallory

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